Hey guys, I’m sorry I haven’t been on here lately, I’ve had a lot to do, and this is kinda the last thing on my list of importance. I don’t know how much longer I’ll be able to update this blog, but I’ll do my best! Thank you to all the new followers and I love you all ! xx
I sat on my front steps staring into space, my mind wandering. I didn’t even notice when the tears started to stream down my face.
"Megan, what’s wrong?" I didn’t see Louis, my best friend, walk up the steps and sit down next to me.
"M-m-my boyfriend cheated on me," I sobbed into his chest. I felt his arms wrap themselves around me and held my trembling body tightly.
"Shhh. It’s okay."
"H-how is t-this okay? He was my boyfriend, what did I ever do to deserve to be cheated on?"
"You haven’t done anything wrong. Nothing at all." He tried to calm me down.
"She was so much prettier than me, so I guess I know why he picked her…"
He looked at me, quite sassily, raising an eyebrow. “Really? You’re going to go there? You’re the most beautiful girl in the world and he’s an absolute idiot if he let you go for some other girl.”
I looked at him, my eyes puffy from crying, “Do you mean that?”
"Of course I mean that. You’re my best friend and," he took a deep breath, "I love you."
"Thanks, Lou. I love you too."
"No, Megan, I love you. Like, I love you; love you…as more than a friend."
My eyes got wide, I never thought of Louis like that even though people mistook us all the time for a couple. That’s when all my emotions came together and I made a major realization. “I love you too, Louis.”
His eyes lit up, “You mean that?”
"Yes, you’ve been there for me when no one else was, you cheer me up, and you’re already my best friend so you know everything about me."
He leaned in and kissed me deeply, “I’m happy your idiot ex-boyfriend cheated on you, because now I can have you and treat you like the princess you are.”
I snuggled into his side, “I’m happy too.”
I woke up to Josh playing with my hair and the bright California sun beaming in the window, “Morning, Bridget.”
"Morning, Josh. Do you have to go to work today?" I asked, voice still thick with sleep.
"No, I have today off. I have a surprise for you, so you have to get up and get dressed so we can go." I noticed Josh was already dressed.
"Where are we going?"
"You’ll see. Just wear shorts and a t-shirt; because I knew that was your next question."
I laughed, “Okay, I’ll be ready soon.” I showered, brushed my teeth, combed my hair, applied some makeup, put on denim shorts and a tank top, slipped on my flip flops and was ready to go. I went downstairs to find Josh on his phone, looking at his Twitter mentions.
"I’m ready to go!"
"Good, we’ll eat breakfast when we get there."
"Can you please tell me where we’re going?" I pouted.
"Don’t worry about it, it’ll be fun."
A half hour later we were pulling up to the gates of Disneyland.
"Are you serious?!" I half questioned, half exclaimed. I’ve wanted to go to Disneyland for such a long time.
We found a parking space and hurried to the ticket counter to purchase our tickets. We got some breakfast before we spent the entire day going on almost every ride at the park and going into the gift shops.
Around nine o’clock at night, we headed over to the Castle for the fireworks display. The whole time Josh had his muscular arm tightly around my waist.
I put my head in the crook of his neck, “Thank you so much for today, Josh. I had an amazing time. It’s nice to be able to spend time with you again.”
He leaned down and kissed me, “It was my pleasure. I love you, Bridget.”
"I love you too, babe."
We both turned back to the amazing fireworks display above us.
"Sabina, are you ready to go?" my friend called from the front door.
I ran down the steps, “Yep, let’s go.”
My best friend insisted that since it was our last night in London, we should go to a club. I decided to go all-out when dressing to go out because I knew I would never see these people again; I wore a short black dress and red pumps.
We got to the club and we were partying it up. We danced with whomever we could, we drank, and we were just having a good time. I just left the dance floor to get another drink when I noticed a blonde-haired boy staring at me from across the bar. Before I knew it, he made his way to me.
"Hey, I’m Niall." I already knew that.
"I’m Sabina," I said, the color in my cheeks changing.
"Nice to meet you. Judging by your accent, you’re not from around here. What brings you to London?" he kept the conversation going.
"My best friend and I are on vacation. Tonight’s actually our last night here so we decided to come to a club," I explained.
"That’s cool. Did you enjoy your stay here?"
"Very much so! I’ve always wanted to visit, so it was a dream come true for me."
I was interrupted by my friend, “Sabina, how long does it take to get a drink?”
"I was just coming back, don’t worry."
I turned to Niall, “It was really nice talking to you.”
He smiled, “It was nice talking to you too. Do you think I could get your number? I would love to get to know you better.”
"Of course! I took a napkin and wrote my number down on it, while he took my phone and typed in his number."
We both smiled at each other, “I’ll definitely use your number,” he stated.
"You better," I flirted back.
I gave him a kiss on the cheek and headed back to the dance floor. It was definitely a good way to end our vacation.
Louis Tomlinson. My best friend since we were three. It’s been a year since I started to like him as more than my best friend, but I haven’t told him because I was afraid he wouldn’t like me like that back and I couldn’t stand the thought of losing my best friend over something stupid.
My phone beeped; a new message from Louis “Dinner at 7?”
I looked at the time: 6:34. “Sounds good. Fancy or casual?”
"Casual. I’ll be there at 7 sharp! Xx"
"See ya then x"
I ran upstairs to get changed. That was Louis for you, he never made plans early; he always waited for the last minute. I already had nice jeans on, so I changed from my t-shirt into a nice floral top, fixed my hair and makeup and at seven o’clock sharp, he was ringing the doorbell.
I opened the door, “Hey, Lou.”
"Hey, Amelia. You ready to go?"
"Yep." I grabbed my purse from the table and locked the door.
We ended up at Milkshake City since neither of us were hungry.
"What’s new with you?" I asked.
"Erm…nothing really." He looked nervous.
He did everything to avoid my gaze, “Nothing at all, why would you think that?”
"I don’t know - maybe because you won’t look me in the eye and you seem really nervous."
He sighed, “Fine. Do you promise not to freak or storm out of here?”
Now I was nervous, “Yes.”
"I like you," he finally said after a moment of silence.
I got butterflies in my stomach, “I like you too, Lou.”
"No, I mean, I like you as more than a friend," he clarified.
"I know, you idiot. I’m saying, I like you as more than a friend too." I smiled at him.
He finally caught my gaze and smiled back at me, looking reassured, “You do?”
"Yes, I have for over a year, but I didn’t want to say anything because I was afraid you wouldn’t like me like that and I didn’t want to lose you."
He leaned over and kissed me, “You’ll never lose me. So does this mean we’re officially boyfriend and girlfriend now, love?”
"I think so," I said, smiling at him again.
That was the start of a wonderful relationship.
Today was the day, the day I finally told Niall about my little problem. I heard the front door creak open and my stomach immediately knotted.
"Chelley, where are you?" Niall called from the entryway of our shared home.
"Up here, babe." I called back.
I heard his tired and heavy footsteps walking up the staircase to the second floor of our house. As his footsteps came closer to our room, where I was sitting, I got more and more nervous.
He opened the door and plopped down on the bed next to me.
"How was your day?" he asked nonchalantly.
"Um…it was okay. I actually have to talk to you about something." My palms got sweaty.
He sat up, looking me straight in the eyes. I took a deep breath and started, “I cut, Niall. When I’m depressed, that’s what I do. It’s the only thing that makes me feel better. Sometimes I don’t even think I should be here at all,” I started crying.
His mouth dropped. He just stared at me for a few minutes before his eyes started to well up, “MyChelle, w-w-why would you do that?”
"I just get really depressed sometimes and it makes me feel better."
He shook his head frantically, “No, no, no. You can’t do that anymore. I’m an idiot for not realizing it sooner, I just —”
I cut him off, “This isn’t your fault. It’s my inner demons.”
He looked like a sad puppy; he stopped crying and was now just extremely upset.
"Can you promise to stop cutting? You’re absolutely gorgeous. I love you more than anything and I hate the thought of losing you. You mean everything to me."
I looked into his piercing blue eyes and knew he meant it. All of a sudden, my inner demons were gone. I knew I was loved more than anything and that I really needed to stop because it was hurting Niall and I had absolutely no intentions of hurting him.
"Promise?" he questioned.
"Yes, I promise. Here, I’ll prove it to you." I got up from the bed and opened the drawer of my nightstand where I kept the razors. His eyes widened when he saw them. I went over to the garbage can and threw them away.
I walked back over to the bed where Niall was still sitting and cuddled into his side. ”I love you, Niall, and I’m sorry that I cut. I love you more than anything and I hate that it hurt you that much.”
"Let’s just forget about it and go watch some movies. Nandos for dinner?"
I laughed, typical Niall. ”Yep, sounds like a good plan to me.”
From that day on, I never cut or was depressed again knowing that there was someone who loved me so much and would be heartbroken if anything ever happened to me.
I’m soooooooooooo sorry that I haven’t updated the fanfic or written any one shots. I have another blog which I was busy writing articles for, so today and tomorrow I’m going to lock myself in my room and write, write, write! Oh, and work on picture preferences ! I’m so sorry and I love you all! Also, welcome to all my new followers :)
Hey loves! I’m baaaack! I received a ton of messages while I was away and tried to answer as many as possible (thank you all for not being anon so I didn’t have to fill everyone’s dashboards up). Chapter 6 of Unexpected Consequences should be up later tonight or tomorrow; one shots will be written; and the picture preferences will be posted as well! I hope y’all don’t hate me too much for being MIA for the past week!
Niall and I were having a good day, relaxing on the couch, until something extremely little caused my panic attack.
"Niall, where’d you go?" I called from the couch, watching television. Niall went upstairs fifteen minutes ago and hasn’t come back yet.
No answer. “Nialler?”
Again, silence. I began to have a panic attack. Breathe, breathe, breathe, I told myself. No such luck. The panic attack was full on now and I sat on the floor and began to cry.
"Niall…?" I tried one more time in between sobs.
Niall came running into the room, “Sina, love, what’s wrong? What happened?”
"What happened? I thought you left or something bad happened to you!" I began to scream, not because I was angry, just because that’s what happened when I had a panic attack.
He wrapped his arms tightly around me, shushing me, trying to make me calm down.
"Love, I’m right here, I had to go upstairs to get a movie for us to watch while we eat dinner. It’s okay; I’m fine, I’m right here."
"But you were gone so long -"
"You know me, I can never decide what movie I want to watch."
I wrapped my arms tightly around his torso, still sobbing. “I’m sorry for this! I can’t control it.”
"Shh. Sina, look at me," his eyes pleaded, "I know you can’t control it. I love you no matter what. We’ll get through this together."
"Thank you, babe," I replied, calming down. "I love you, thank you for everything you do for me."
"Anything for you, love."
For the rest of the night, we sat on the couch and watched Finding Nemo, our favorite movie to watch together.
"Nialler, I think we’re lost."
"No, Bonnie, I know exactly where we are…"
"And where would that be?"
He looked down at the ground, “Exactly the same place we were a half hour ago.”
"This isn’t good, not good at all," I panicked.
"Princess, calm down, everything will be just fine."
"It better be," I mumbled.
This was all Niall’s genius idea. He told me this morning that he wanted to spend his day off going for a walk on a nature trail close to our flat; I didn’t interject, it seemed like it was a good idea…at the time. That was until about an hour or so ago when I realized that Niall was reading the trail map wrong, causing us to get lost in the woods somewhere. It was fall, so the leaves were falling, there was a slight chill in the air, and the sun set early.
I pulled my jacket closer around my body and looked at the sky, which was getting darker. “Babe, I’m freaking out.”
"Princess, don’t worry everything will be -"
Niall got cut off by a clap of thunder just as he was about to say fine.
I jumped in his arms. “You were saying?”
He laughed gently, “It’ll be okay.” I got down from his arms.
Just as he said that, it started to pour. I raised an eyebrow at him.
He looked at me, slightly shocked.
"You know how you always wanted that romantic kiss in the rain?"
Before I knew what hit me, I felt him crash his lips into mine. When we finally broke the kiss, we shared a look and smiled at each other, completely soaked from the rain.
He wrapped his arm around me tightly, took out the map, and started to lead us back to where our car was.
"We’ll be out of here soon, Princess. I’m sorry."
I looked up at him, “Are you crazy? This was fun.”
I pecked him on the cheek and we kept walking in the right direction, eventually reaching our car.
"Faith, are you ready to go?" Zayn called from the front door.
"I’ll be down in a minute!" I yelled downstairs from our bedroom, putting my hoop earring in my ear. I checked my outfit in the mirror one more time: denim shorts, white and pink flowery tank top, and white gladiator sandals. Approving of my appearance, I hurried down the steps to find Zayn standing by the door, staring out the window.
Zayn and I decided yesterday afternoon that today we were going to the local park for a picnic, just the two of us, away from mobs of people and obsessive fans. Zayn packed our picnic basket while I got ready.
"Hurry, I don’t want the food to go bad."
"I’m right here!"
He turned to face me, “Wow, you look…wow.”
"Thank you. You don’t look too bad yourself there, babe," I remarked.
He just smiled at me. “Ready?”
"I sure am!"
"Then let’s go."
We hopped in the car and headed over to the park which was a half hour away. The farther we were from our flat, the less likely that fans would find us. There was a parking space right near the park, so Zayn parked the car and we found a spot for us to set up our picnic blanket.
I laid the picnic blanket down underneath a cherry blossom tree and sat down, Zayn following suit. While we enjoyed the sandwiches and snacks that Zayn packed, we talked about what was new from the previous day since we hadn’t really been able to talk about our days since he got home late last night from the recording studio.
After we finished lunch, Zayn laid against the tree and I tucked myself under his arm, cuddling into his side. We sat like that in silence for a while, enjoying the fact that no fans had found us, until a cherry blossom from the tree above us fell down and landed on my leg. He tucked my loose hair behind my ear, sat up, picked up the flower, and tucked it behind my ear.
"Now that makes you look more like a princess," he complimented.
I blushed, “Thanks, babe.”
We went back to the position we were in before the flower fell and Zayn kissed the top of my head, “I love you, boo.”
“I love you too, Zayn.”
"Marina?" Josh called from the kitchen.
"Can you come here for a second, please?"
I walked into the kitchen, “Yes?”
"Lou and Harry invited us over to their flat to watch a movie and for pizza with the rest of the lads, do you wanna go?" he asked, leaning against the marble counter.
"Sure, what time?"
"Way to give me some advanced notice, Devine," I remarked sarcastically.
"Are you ready to go or -"
"Nope, I’m ready." I slipped on a pair of sandals, grabbed my purse and Josh and I headed over to Louis and Harry’s flat. Five minutes later, we were there.
Josh and I walked hand-in-hand from the car to the front door. We rang the doorbell and Harry answered.
"Hey, Harry," I said, Josh and I walking through the door into the living room where the rest of the boys already were.
"Hey, Josh. Hey, Marina," they called in unison.
We sat down and talked while Harry went to order the pizzas.
"So what movie are we watching?" Josh inquired.
"Paranormal Activity," Niall answered nonchalantly.
Josh, who had his arm wrapped around my arm, squeezed my shoulder softly, knowing I was scared of horror movies. “Do you want to go home?” he asked me.
I looked down at my hands, playing with my nails, “No, I’ll be fine.”
He kissed my cheek, “Okay, love.”
Once the pizzas came, we started watching the movie. About half-way through the scariness started to get to me and I slowly moved closer and closer to Josh, eventually ending up cuddled on his lap. Josh took this opportunity to kiss me and I kissed him back. Forgetting where we were, the kiss deepened before we were interrupted.
"Could you two possibly get a room? We’re trying to watch the movie and you’re distracting us," Zayn complained.
"What do you say we go home and watch a good, non-scary movie?" Josh asked, whispering in my ear.
I nodded my head in agreement, “That sounds good to me.”
"Alright, mates, we’re gonna head home," Josh announced.
The boys paused the movie while we said our goodbyes.
"You two have fun," Harry called cheekily from the door as Josh and I got in the car.
"We will," I called back, winking.
Harry just smiled and shook his head of curls, while closing the door.
Marina, I hope you enjoyed it!
List of one shots in order of when they’ll be done
* Order is based on when they were requested. If you don’t see your request here, message me.
All the requested picture preferences and one shots are written in this book so I have a list so I know in which order to do them. I think it’s an appropriate notebook :)
I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror, examining my features; I hated the way I looked. I never thought I could never make my long dark brown hair look decent, and my dark brown eyes weren’t cheerful. Why couldn’t I have blonde hair and blue or green eyes like the girls on the cover of my favorite magazines?
I walked out of the bathroom into the bedroom Josh and I shared. I made my way over to my cherry wood nightstand to get out the small razor I used when I started to hate on myself. Cutting was the only way to make myself feel better. As I made my way back to the bathroom, Josh came strolling through our bedroom door. I tried my hardest to conceal the razor so he wouldn’t see it - mainly because he didn’t know about my habit of cutting because I always hid my cuts with bracelets or long-sleeve shirts.
"Hey babe," Josh said happily.
Josh glanced down at my hand, “lorna, what’s in your hand?”
I tightened the grip on the razor, “Nothing, I was just going to the bathroom.”
"You’re lying. Now tell me what’s in your hand."
"Really, it’s nothing, if you’d excuse me, I have to go to the bathroom."
He blocked the doorway to the bathroom and walked forward, causing me to walk backwards, falling onto our bed. He grabbed my hand that the blade was in and looked me straight in the eyes.
“lorna, what is this?” he asked, eyes filled with sadness.
I remained silent, hoping he would let the question die out.
"Please tell me you don’t cut," his eyes pleading.
"I-I-I do," I admitted, sitting up.
"I don’t look like the models on the covers of the magazines. I’m certainly not pretty enough. I don’t understand why you’re still with me, there are so many other gorgeous girls out there," I sobbed into his chest.
"Love, why didn’t you talk to me about this earlier, I could’ve helped you!"
"I didn’t want to bother you with my insecurities."
"No, no, no, never feel that way! I love you no matter what, you’re beautiful just the way you are and I wouldn’t have you any other way. I love you, please stop cutting!"
"I love you too, Josh."
"Promise me you’ll stop cutting."
I sighed, “I promise I’ll stop cutting.”
He kissed me, “Is that the only blade you have?”
I nodded my head honestly, “Yes, it is.”
He carefully took it out of my hands and headed over to the garbage can, tossing the blade into the garbage. He walked over to me and put his strong arms around me, embracing me.
"I love you, I’m sorry I didn’t find out earlier. If you ever feel the need to cut again, please come and talk to me, cutting isn’t the answer."
"Josh, there was no way you could have known, I was extremely secretive about it. I promise that I’m done, there’s no need for it anymore. As long as you love me the way I am, then there’s no reason for me to cut. I love you too."
Josh and I then decided that dinner was a good idea so we could talk and headed out hand-in-hand to get some food; me feeling 100% more confident in my appearance than I did before.
Iorna, I hope you like it!
Just a side note for everyone, please never cut, you’re all absolutely gorgeous just the way you are!! If you ever need someone to talk to, my ask box is always open <3